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That wouldn’t have made a difference, of course, but the president was an easy person to blame. He decided to hold a press conference.This virus is bad. Real bad. Took our manhood is what they say. But most of what you’re hearing is just media hype. Look around you. Nobody’s sick! We’re having bigger orgasms than ever. We’ve got scientists, the best scientists, working on a cure. But the media is full of doom and gloom. We don’t need that.It’s always been that way. Longer than I can remember. And my memory’s good. Real good. Take World War II for instance. No, my memory’s not that good, but I read about it. Read a lot. I probably know more about World War II than anyone alive. And it was all media hype.One good headline and before long, there were shortages of tires, gas rationing, lines a mile long to sign up for the army. The media blew it all out of proportion and we just went about our daily lives, living with the hype and trying to buy our ration of sugar. Everyone was in a. Yet each time you die, it never sticks around for long because you always find yourself alive and well just a few seconds later, in an entirely new body. No worse for wear.Apparently, the boys in lab coats refer to it as Regenerative Immortality. You personally just called it the respawn power since it reminded you of how video games worked, but hey, different strokes for different folks.You’ve had this power ever since you were born, supposedly. Based on how the SCP Foundation found and collected you after a poor old lady found a car filled with dead babies who all died of heatstroke, you’re inclined to believe it.The Foundation found a great use of your power, as they would repeatedly use you as a test subjects for many dangerous experiments, thus leading to the whole list of deaths mentioned above.While it’s not the life you would have chosen, it’s honestly not entirely bad.Compared to the D-Class saps that were forced to be here due to their criminal history, you were treated.
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